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In 1999 my mother, whom I was very close to, passed away very suddenly
in her sleep while taking a nap. She used to teach the hula out of our
home in Toronto, Canada, when I was young child. She had no Hawaiian
blood, just a love of the Hawaiian culture and a love of dance. Her
stage name was Leilani and she used to perform at cultural centers and
shopping malls along with the dance troupe that she formed and taught.
Upon her passing, my younger brother decided that he wanted to marry
his girlfriend of six years and wanted to get married on Mother’s
Day in Hawaii in honor of our mom. So, they whipped a Maui wedding together
in a matter of weeks.
During this trip to Maui, I met a total stranger on Front Street in
Lahaina. It was love at first sight. We smiled at one another and said
a quick “aloha”. That was the extent of our first meeting.
And then over the course of the next five days, we bumped into each
other another 3 times in different places, some obscure. The third meeting
was on the other side of the island while driving 50 mph on the highway
in the lanes next to one another. I was in a Jeep with the top off so
my hair was flying all over my face and there he was next to me waving
his arms around, frantically giving the shaka sign, trying to get my
attention. When this happened, I knew that we were meant to meet and
to know one another. Fate along with some effort, brought us together
one more time on Front Street and then we began a long distance relationship
for almost a year while I was living in New York City and he in Lahaina,
Maui. In the year 2000 I decided to move to Maui to be with him.
Then on September 11th, 2001 everything changed. The world changed.
This was the catalyst that changed the course of my life. Prior to 9-11
I had a thriving graphic design business in the entertainment industry
where I telecommuted with clients back in New York City and also in
Hawaii. I had built a strong client base back in New York and was able
to continue working with them after the move to Hawaii, thanks to the
internet. But, after 9-11 my business flatlined, along with countless
others. My clientele was primarily in NYC and Hawaii, the two most economically
affected parts of the country (Hawaii having been cut off from the rest
of the country due to the fear of air travel). I was left with a bunch
of expenses, no income, no work and what seemed to be no hope for more
than a year. Phone call after phone call simply resulted in nothing.
Businesses were closing left and right. It was devastating. The events
of 9-11 and the aftermath left me financially, spiritually, and emotionally
broken...emotionally because I was still very connected to New York
and my clients, friends and family there.
I had a friend who escaped from the 70th floor and I also had a client
who perished on the 101st floor of the World Trade Center. I also lived
just 2 blocks away from the twin towers and used to use the towers to
focus on for meditations. I would lay on pillows on my balcony and just
stare at these magnificent buildings in front of me. It was powerful.
So, a shift took place for me after 9-11 and I decided that it was time
to follow my heart and just create my art. If I couldn’t make a
living doing what I had been doing for over 15 years (graphic design),
then I might as well be doing what I absolutely love and am completely
passionate about (creating art from the heart). And now, I can truthfully
say that if it weren’t for 9-11, I may not have ever found my higher
path - a path that has lead me to being able to share my gifts with
others - to share my art with the world. Through darkness, there IS
light...
Many people ask if I am still with the man that I moved to Maui to be
with, but unfortunately the relationship did not work out, but I feel
like he was the vehicle - an angel - that brought me to Hawaii, which
in turn led me to creating my fine art, which in turn lead me to my
higher path. Just this past year, I created a photo collage titled “Memories
of You” which I dedicated to this wonderful man. He too, suddenly
passed away prematurely, at the age of 49.
So, the story continues... I create my art from my heart and observe
and ponder upon all that takes place around it, wondering about what
is next and where my art will bring me or who it will draw towards me.
It’s been an interesting journey so far and I know it will continue
to bring even more beautiful memories, beautiful people and beautiful
experiences into my life that will serve as inspiration to continue
to do what I do and continue to remind me of why I am here.
- Carolyn Quan
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